Miss AP’s Guide To Coachella
What’s the big deal about Coachella? Is there any more to it than a thousand pretty blondes in abbreviated denim shorts and the possibility of seeing Rihanna smoking a spliff?
Well, I went last year to find out and I’m here to tell the tale, and impart my usual dose of wisdom should you have chosen to attend the World’s Most Selfie’d Festival.
1. DON’T try to have too much fun. Nobody really drinks here – there are actual designated pens for when you want to have a beer so it’s not the kind of place you lurch about clutching an Evian bottle filled with your own home made Mai Tai. Head for a cocktail at the Mulberry party. What do you mean you’re not on the list?
2. DON’T wear a Native American Indian headdress. Or a floral headdress, come to think of it. If you want to stand out at all just wear a mask. The Harlequin mask will do nicely, and can work when you’re trying to sneak around incognito as you try to stir up trouble.
3. DO Stay at the Ace Hotel in Palm Springs, a hipster honey-pot in the middle of the desert with two pools full of beautiful people and some decent DJs spinning tunes that you can sip your Campari Soda to while you pose in your best AP swimsuit.
4. DO Pack a silk bag stuffed with suspenders, bustles, babydolls and kimonos. If you can’t get dirty you may as well get sexy. And make other people get sexy with you. No, you won’t find an Orgy Dome at Coachella I’m afraid, but you might find a nice VIP teepee in which to make a few friends.
5. DO book in for dinner at Norma’s in the Viceroy Hotel, for a stylish night with killer cocktails as you overlook the beautiful gardens.
6. DO book in some post-festival down-time (not that you’ll need it) at the Post Ranch Inn in Big Sur. This place is off the scale – think private infinity pools looking over the Pacific, sprawling log cabins with wood-burning fireplaces, and a fabulous spa to flush out all those ‘toxins’.