MISS AP’S LITTLE PINK BOOK: LONDON
Oh, London, how do I love thee? Let me count the ways. You hide a secret around every corner, you house more multi-millionaires than any other European city, your railway arches are used for wild Bacchanalian orgies, your greasy spoons have caused a thousand angioplasties. And your famous Westminster Bridge casts brilliantly phallic shadows on the ground at unsuspecting tourists’ feet. London may not have quite as many songs written about it as New York, but that is simply because the Brits boast about themselves less than Americans.
It’s quite simply the best city in the world, hands down. Why? Because I live there.
Here’s my guide to the city’s sexiest spots.
Where to begin? At Bob Bob Ricard’s in Soho, with a perfect margarita in a crystal coupe served by a hot Frenchman in a pink waistcoat. Where to end? At Duck and Waffle, London’s newest sky high 24-hour sin den. Where to middle? Try any permutation and combination of the following on a night out and you’re guaranteed to end up like me, joining the skyscraper club in Duck and Waffle at 5am and bearing the window-rub scars to prove it. Try: Nightjar for Prohibition kicks, 64 Colebrook Row for sneaky canoodling, the bar at the Connaught when you’re alone but don’t want to stay that way, The Russian Bar in Dalston for gritty pole dance drinking, Gordon’s wine bar for subterranean Ploughmans consumption.
A girl’s gotta eat to keep up with London’s relentless schedule. Have breakfast at the Wolseley, go for sexy cake at Cocomaya in the afternoon, and face up to a porterhouse steak with mac n’ cheese sides at Hawksmoor in Covent Garden for dinner. Other Provocateur favourites are Beagle in Hoxton, housed in Railway arches and run by a pair of sexy DJ brothers, and Morito on Exmouth Market for little lickety bowls of smoky Moorish deliciousness.
Miss AP likes her nights long, sweaty and climaxing at sunrise. If this is your thing then join London’s party elite in warehouses, on rooftops and at the tops of skyscrapers, where the best DJs in the world play to a perpetually banging crowd. My favourite nights? Krankbrother for banging beats, Blitz for wartime frolics, and Torture Gardens for latex and meat cleavers with your techno.
Agent Provocateur at number 1 Grosvenor Street is London’s sexiest shopping address, and I don’t think I need to explain why.
Don’t forget to take home something truly provocative from AP’s favourite city – play the naughty maid in the bestselling sheer Juniper, strap yourself into the Lacy playsuit and go all out in the ‘oh-so-sexy’ button-down Erikka dress with sheer lace panels.
There’s nowhere quite like the back of a black cab for a spot of spontaneous playtime. Prefer it vertical? Get points for catching some quality time in the plush Art Deco elevator at Claridges.